Does Britain Have the X-Factor?
Ant and Dec made a very poignant point at the end of last nights super-sparkly finale. "Thanks to all our contestants, to everyone who came to the auditions. Without you, there would be no show." I dream of the day that the doors open at the auditions and no-one remembers to turn up. Ant and Dec sit awkwardly on stools, the judges play music from happier times, the camera man films a pigeon eating an old kebab in the carpark. Eventually the boredom gets too much and everyone will slump out of the building. Last out would be the caretaker, who will turn the light off and say "well that's that then" before closing the door to the party forever. Britain has got so much talent. It's just that people are looking in the wrong place. Sure the next molded popstar to come through the show successfully is a reasonably good singer and I'm sure he and his family are very happy for him. But, within a year, I predict he will be sitting in a pub outside Aberdeen having...